Find The Hidden Chapel At The Top Of This Mountain

You ever heard of my g, Moses? Ever wanted to climb to the place where he received the Ten Commandments from God? Ever wanted to see THE Burning Bush as described in the holy book? Nah me neither but here’s a hike you can do that is a little off the grid and not as basic as my short stint in Yosemite.

So, where/what am I talking about? In the depths of the Egyptian desert is a place called Saint Catherine’s Monastery; this monastery lies at the bottom of a mountain called, Mount Sinai or to locals, ‘Gebel Musa’ (Mount Moses). Bare tourists flock to the site on pilgrimage but I know you’re all in it for the Insta so here’s how to ‘do’ Mount Sinai right.

St Catherine’s Monastery is located slap bang in the centre of a region called the Sinai. A region often overlooked by the Egyptian government and not ventured to by many tourists due to its unsafe narrative. Since the revolution in 2011, Egypt’s tourism has dropped significantly and unfortunately, the Sinai isn’t an area where political turmoil has ceased.

However, the trouble is closely contained in the northern part of the area so you will actually be fine visiting. It’s for the GRAM C’MON LOSERS.

The British Government advises all but essential travel to the area in which the monastery is located. You just have to ask yourself one question: Is my blog essential? Obvs.

Lol British Government travel advice – what do they know?

Nah, but seriously, this means that most travel insurers won’t cover you so you know, be careful, don’t break a leg on the mountain, don’t get bamboozled by a camel etc.

Ok, on to the hike. Where should you stay? There are a couple of hotels (if you can call them that) near the monastery but after reading the reviews I decided not to put my body through that. One review said they had to sleep in their dirty clothes from the hike because the beds were that dirty. Niiiiiicee.

No filter I swear, Dahab is peng

So, stay in the nearby cities of Dahab or Sharm El Sheikh. If you went on a package beach holiday with your family in between the years of 2000 and 2011, you probably went to Sharm El Sheikh, or it was a strong option. It’s a beautiful beach town. Both are world renowned for their diving spots and landscapes. Kill two birds with one stone and have a nice resort to come back to after the hike.

The hotels will run tours to St Catherine’s but will rip you off. APPARENTLY, the ‘done’ thing is to start climbing at 12 (midnight) in order to catch the sunrise at the top at 5am/6am. Don’t do that.

Ask the hotel for a taxi to take you and pay for a mountain guide when you get there. Isn’t part of the enjoyment of hiking getting to see where you’re going? Also, wouldn’t you rather SEE the camel shit you’re stepping in?

Anyway, if you go any time other than Summer then you’ll be able to climb in the day. It’s not that high up and if you’re relatively alright health-wise, it won’t take you that long. Fun fact: It’s 3,750 steps up. HA HA grant me the sweet release of death now.

There are two routes up the mountain. Numero 1: The ‘Camel Path’; this takes 2-3 hours one way and is longer and shallower than the other route, which brings me onto numero 2: The ‘Steps of Penitence’; this bad boy is 1.5-2 hours one way and is more direct. FYI because numero 2 is only available to climb during the day and is a little harder, you won’t see any tourists.

Once you reach the top you’ll be greeted by a chapel built in 1934 on the ruins of a 16th century church but who cares about that right? You’ll be standing in the EXACT spot where Moses received the 10 commandments after spending 40 days and 40 nights in the desert. The EXACT spot. I’m calling bullshit but fair.

When you come back down, you’ll be able to visit the monastery (the actual attraction), a UNESCO World Heritage site – am I impressing you yet ehhh?  Well, actually, you might be able to, you might not be able to. The monastery is closed for most of the time, open from 9am-12pm on most days and only open for 1 hour on Fridays and Sundays. BUT, bribe the doorman who looks like a villain from a Disney film and you’ll get exclusive access.

I know I shouldn’t be promoting the whole bribing thing but a priest’s gotta eat too.

The monastery was built between 548 and 565, it’s one of the oldest in the world and has the oldest operating library in the world. Prior to the British Library it was home to one of the four great manuscripts that contained the entire text of the Bible.

I’m not gonna bore you with the rest of the history of the place, you can Google it or message me if you’re interested in that BUT if you are interested in doing something a little different, going somewhere a little different and experiencing something a little different, then please, go.

Egypt has so much to offer and it would be a shame if my Insta game wasn’t rivalled by at least one of you xo

Guide used: Ashraf – GREAT GUY, became my insta boyfriend for the afternoon. If you’re planning on going, message me for his deets.

View from the top

THE Burning Bush

Clock that sweat patch bitches

The Forgotten WWII Cemetery Tucked Away In The Desert

As it’s Remembrance Day I thought it important to raise awareness of the forgotten troops who are laid to rest in the most unlikely place.

Today marks 100 years since the end of the First World War and though a day to remember those who gave their lives in WWI, in recent years it has become a day to remember Commonwealth troops who have died in all wars across the last century.

So who are the troops who fell in 1942 that I’m referencing? They were part of Britain’s Eight Army in North Africa. As kids we’re taught about The Battle of Somme, we’re shown the horrific remains of concentration camps in Germany and we’re taken to Ypres on school trips. But, what if I told you that there was a place where almost triple the amount of WWII soldiers are buried compared to the Ypres Reservoir Cemetery in Belgium?

Of the 11,866 who are commemorated, 7,240 Commonwealth soldiers are buried in the town of El Alamein on the north coast of Egypt (150 miles north-west of Cairo). You’re probably thinking where? You’d be right in having this reaction. I had no idea this existed until I went to visit the nearby city of Marsa Matrouh.

I stepped out of the car into an unbearable heat. All I saw were some pick up trucks, some diggers and some confused labourers. Was I in the right place? I passed by some tarpaulin and was greeted with this, the forgotten cemetery…

So, what actually happened there all those years ago AND why have we forgotten about it? In January of 1942 the German commander, Erwin Rommel began to move eastward in an attempt to secure North Africa and the Suez Canal after their hold in Libya. By the Summer the Axis troops had reached the town of El Alamein.

The first of two battles commenced and 13,250 Allied troops were either killed or wounded. This battle ended in a stalemate and the British General, Claude Auchinleck was sacked, his replacement was killed and so Bernard Montgomery was left to take charge.

Montgomery had time to build an offensive whilst Rommel was still suffering from losses of the first battle and on the defensive. In October, Montgomery used a diversion in the South and attacked from the north. Progress was slow from the Allied forces but infantry in the Australian and New Zealand divisions helped create an opening in the Axis’ defence that the British could exploit.

On 2nd November Rommel told Hitler the battle had been lost and withdrew his men. Operation Torch confirmed the victory (Anglo-American landings in North Africa on 8th November). The second battle left 9,800 Allied dead, 9,000 wounded and 9,000 Axis dead, 15,000 wounded and 30,000 captured.

The battles were significant as they led to the German surrender in North Africa. So why have we forgotten about it? I don’t know. That’s it, I don’t have some grand reasoning other than that we feel detached from something so far from home.

Last month the British government, for the first time, paid for 6 veterans to visit the battlefield on the 76th anniversary. All of them, now in their 90s, recalled the horrors they experienced all those years ago.

I had no idea about any of this but maybe I’m just ignorant? I guess my point in writing this was not just to give you a small history lesson but to highlight the importance of remembrance. Here are thousands of soldiers who have been left in the desert and forgotten by the many. We take modern day values and ways of thought for granted. We need to remember all who have died and why.

Remembrance Sunday is not an attempt to glorify war but to simply remember those who have died. It is an opportunity to honour the dead. Attach whatever meaning you want to the day but ultimately the day belongs to the fallen soldier.

Wearing a poppy isn’t some kind of jingoism that should be associated with a warped nationalism but with respect and honour. Today, think of peace and hope.

Lest we forget.

Egypt: a country steeped in bribery or just good tips?

As I’m sure you will have noticed I’ve stopped banging on about America now and managed to find myself in Egypt. Not spiritually, just bantering about with my parents. I’m HALF EGYPTIAN don’tcha know.

Throughout this blog you’re going to see some images that are pretty cool (in my humble opinion) but I would never have been able to capture these if not for one thing, money.

Everyone expects a backhander or are we to call that a tip? Here’s just a few things I wouldn’t have been able to do if it weren’t for this ‘tipping culture’:

• Climb on the pyramid next to a sign that says “No climbing”

• Take a picture of hieroglyphs inside a tomb

• Go behind the pyramids for that ‘wonder shot’

• Special access to the Sphinx

• Drive a bell hop’s golf buggy in a hotel

Breakfast with a view

I knew that I wanted to go out into the desert so I could see the pyramids from afar but had no idea my guide would have to ‘tip’ everybody and their brother along the way.

We came out of the hotel and were immediately approached by a tall, rat-like man who offered us a deal — 400 LE (around £18) for a 2 hour camel ride. We took one look at the hill beside us and chose to take the man up on his offer.

He told us he would take us to where we could pick up the camels and our guide. Soon enough rat-man pulled around in his rat-mobile and we got in. In hindsight this probably wasn’t the smartest decision, getting in a random, ratty man’s car.

Nevertheless, the rat-mobile served us well as we were taken down some backstreets to our camels, Michael Jackson and Mickey Mouse. I took one look at the white one and was like nah, absolutely not, that is not a bit of me. It looked so angry so I left my mum to that demise.

After the initial struggle of getting on the camel we plodded along the ‘authentic’ route to the back of the pyramids. I have never seen so many loose animals left to their own devices, think horses, donkeys, camels, goats, dogs. Men flying past in flip flops on horses.

At one point my mum (the native Egyptian can I remind you) tried to warn a tourist not to keep touching the dogs. The woman looked at my mum like she was a stupid bitch and ignored her; she was white with dreadlocks, woven bracelets up and down her arms, patterned trousers, you know the type. Probably a travel blogger or something, typical. Have fun getting rabies ya dickhead.

Anyway, so we’re in the desert and my main man Karam says he will take “AMAZING” pictures for me, all I have to do is wait. And you know what, he was SO right. Karam became my insta boyfriend for the next two hours, whata guy (see below).

My main man Karam

We get to a good viewing point and Karam goes over to a man and hands him a note. Next, we go up close to the big boi pyramid and he tells me to climb over the railing. I look at him like are you sure hun and he simply tells me to be quick and hands another note over to two men.

I climbed up a few steps and one man started shouting at me “Enough, enough!” Karam tried to reason with him whilst still taking photos, MY G. Lastly on this tour, the Sphinx. Whilst all the other normies were crowded on the other side Karam took me round to a road alongside the Sphinx where no one was. Got these cracking pics didn’t I?!

Just kiss me bitch

We come to the end of our journey and of course, common etiquette is to tip the tour guide, right? My mum hands over a 100 LE note to which Karam questions the amount. “For both of you?” he asks, “it’s for my kids”. She apologises profusely and hands over another 100. Whilst we weren’t actively ‘tipping’ all these officials along the way, I can’t help but think whether the money was handed to them or Karam it was all for the same thing, bribery. There’s no other way to address it, it’s bribery.

Whilst the pyramids is a hot spot for tourists from all over, a lesser known place called Saqqara isn’t, yet still as active in its taking of bribes, SORRY, tips. The site contains pyramids, tombs, ruins etc. There is a man at the entrance of every tomb waiting not for you but for his money.

We picked up a nice man along the way who asked if we wanted to ride his horse, (his actual horse don’t worry) and off we went. He showed us around , gave us some interesting history and of course, again, I’d think it natural to tip this man who had spent the good portion of an hour with us.

However, I would not expect to tip the man who let me pass into the tomb. We had already paid entry into the sites, why would I need to pay again for no extra service? Mahmoud had let us take pictures in the tomb and similarly to Karam had rushed us before anyone saw. He asked us to tip the man who guarded the tomb on the way out; I realise now it was for the privilege of being able to break the rules.

It’s a lax society in some ways and not in others. Do you really think I would have been able to drive a golf buggy around the hotel if we hadn’t been tipping the bell boy well? Actually, this is a bad example, he was A KIND MAN; he probs would have let me ride it around.

My point is at every turn it seems like someone is after what they call in Arabic, “baksheesh”. Ask any Egyptian about the country’s recent history of corruption and they will condemn it. Ask them about the 100 LE they used to get a government document processed a little faster and they will condone it.

The little man forgets an act of bribery is corruption no matter on what scale. Many Egyptians are tired of the regime they’ve succumbed to but perhaps this is part of a culture ingrained so deeply that it can’t change. Who am I to hold judgement? I don’t live here. I don’t fully understand the culture. I don’t understand that maybe this is ‘just the way things work’.

Should I refuse to partake in it? On this kind of scale, is it bribery or is it really just ‘good tips’? Where does the line blur? It happens all over the world.

As always let me know your thoughts in the comments or email me, inbox me, DM me, anything you want fellas.

ALSO, keep updated on the journey by doing me a solid and following me on Instagram. Cheers xoxo

See below for details of where I stayed and who I’d recommend taking tours with :

Hotel: Marriott Mena House, Giza

Tours: Giza pyramids, the man in the picture called Karam. Straight opposite the Mena House entrance.

Saqqara, Mahmoud and his horses (message me for a phone number)

Look how ripped I look

Does it look like I’m flying?

Hahaha

Saqqara